As you probably know I am off sunning myself in Crete this week – well at least I hope I am! In reality I’m probably sweating profusely whilst trying to wrestle Luisa into a sun hat for the 29th time this morning. The very lovely Ami from My Mummy Spam has kindly written this guest post to keep you company whilst I’m away. She has written about a really hot topic amongst parents – whether or not she should feel guilty for being a working parent.

The very lovely Ami from My Mummy Spam has kindly written this guest post to keep you company whilst I'm away. She has written about a really hot topic amongst parents - whether or not she should feel guilty for being a working parent.

I would say I have many of the same feelings as Ami on the topic, albeit from a different perspective. I think that just goes to show how parents are always capable of being hard on themselves and feeling guilty no matter their choices. As you know I’m still at home with Luisa despite my maternity leave just ending and for now I’m really happy with my choice. Whether you work full-time, part-time or stay at home with your kids I believe the choice is entirely yours and there are merits to all paths.

I definitely agree that it’s great to set an example for your child/children by earning a wage and this is something I plan to do for Luisa in the future. What I would say is that work can take many forms; high paid, low paid or unpaid and take place in many locations be that in the office or at home. Like Ami, I think it is utterly wrong to judge anyone for their own deeply personal choice to go out into the world of work or to stay at home.

Without any further ado – over to Ami.


 

I am proud to call myself a working Mum. Yes, it can be hard at times but I honestly feel proud that I am able to be a working Mum. Please do not think I am bashing anyone who is a stay at home mum. In fact, I have the upmost respect for you stay at home Mum’s as I don’t know how you do it?! I think I would go insane if I didn’t go to work and here is where my guilt lies.
I love going to work most of the time and love that I get to be Ami and have adult conversation for 3 days a week. Don’t get me wrong, I miss my little boy when I am not with him and there are days where he is poorly and needs me and I will stay with him but as a rule I really enjoy my time at work. Does that make me a bad mother? Should I feel guilt for feeling like this?
Some people I have spoken to have said yes. When I have shared my feeling about this I have been met with comments like:
‘’Well why have a child if you are going to let someone else raise them?’’
‘’How can you be away from your baby for 3 days a week and risk missing any milestones or firsts?’’
‘’It’s selfish that you enjoy going to work to be away from your child!’’
I say..each to their own. Bubba goes to my Mum (who is a childminder) whilst I am at work and he loves it! Why should I feel guilty that my son is learning how to socialise and mix with other children? Why should I not be happy when I see him playing with the other children at my mum’s house and seeing him trying to communicate and copy them? I am proud of him AND me that I am able to take him places and he will go off and happily play with other children and I believe that is because I have gone to work and left him since he was about 10 months old.
Another reason I feel proud of myself for going to work is because I feel that I am teaching my son that to have nice things Mummy and Daddy have to go to work. In my eyes, it is teaching him the value of things and hopefully making him see (in the long run) that things just don’t fall on your lap you have to work for them.
I do sometimes have twinges of guilt though. Especially on those days where he is being a real grot bag and I actually miss being at work. I am talking about those days where you can even have a wee in peace because someone wants to come with you. I love that I can go to work 3 days a week and have a pee in peace and drink a hot cup of coffee! It’s amazing and it makes me feel like an actual person rather than just a sleep deprived mummy.
So to all you working Mummy’s out there I say; don’t feel guilty! Feel proud that you are doing what your doing and enjoy that hot cup of coffee and adult chat because before you know it you will be back to microwaved 3 times coffee and Mr Tumble!


If you enjoyed this post as much as I did please take the time to pop over to My Mummy Spam and read some more of Ami’s brilliant musings. You can also keep up with her on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram & Youtube.