Hello πŸ™‚ When this baby is born i’m going to bite it right on the butt. Yes, you read that correctly. I am going to bite my infant directly on the bum with my adult human teeth.

My main motivation for this is revenge. For the last few weeks I’ve had a pinched nerve in my right ass cheek that makes me hobble, trip over and wince like there is a bat up my rectum, usually with no warning. Don’t judge me.

So today I am 32+2 andΒ firmly established in the third AND FINAL trimester. I know everyone says this but I really can’t believe I’ve made it this far! Where has the time gone? etc etc. I saw the midwife at 22 and 30 weeks and baby is happy according to her! All my bloods are coming back fine so that’s a relief. She did say that baby is measuring on the bigger side but not ‘officially big’ I also got another rap on the knuckles for being a bit dehydrated. oops.

I have another appointment in a week or so and i’ll let you know if fatty has slowed his/her growth spurt or not.

Symptoms?

Aside from the electric shocks in the bum and leg I am still doing fine. A little tired and puffy after a long day but nothing much of note. Heartburn persists but I’ve learnt to put up with it.

Stretch marks?

Still none.

Hail Mary, full of grace. The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death, Amen.

Cravings?

Nothing in particular. I tend to be leaning more towards savory foods these days and I’m less picky and indecisive.

Happy or moody?

I’m feeling totally fab, really honestly couldn’t be happier. Sorry!

What’s New?

I’m pretty sure I could poo on demand. If a stool sample is required without notice I don’t imagine i’ll have any problem producing the goods. Not sure if this is a third trimester thing or I’m just eating lots… I’ve also started having braxton hicks. Usually a few times a day and not painful at all, just unusual.

If you’d like to read the rest of my pregnancy updates – click here!

Til next time! x

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